In order to include and strengthen the positive effects of meditation in your life, how often you practice is more important than how long you spend meditating. In this article, suggestions that will help you turn meditation into a habit by making it easier for you to meditate regularly are waiting for you!
“ What is meditation ?” We can briefly answer the question as a conscious awareness practice that strengthens our present existence by focusing on the sensations in our body, an object or an activity. Thanks to meditation, we can establish stronger and deeper relationships with the people in our lives, have a more restful sleep, and cope better with difficult emotions. By paying attention to the present moment, the feelings in our body, and what is happening outside, we begin to enjoy life more with a calmer mind.
The importance and benefits of regular meditation
Meditation has many benefits supported by scientific research, such as better coping with emotions such as stress and anxiety, increasing presence in relationships, and improving attention skills. In order to include and strengthen these effects in your life, how often you practice is more important than how long you spend meditating. Of course, the effects of occasional very long meditation practices cannot be denied. But taking a few minutes every day can completely change the complexion of our day. Therefore, regular repeated meditation practice, even for short periods of time, can create a bigger change in our lives.We need to make regular time and effort to add something to ourselves and internalize the things we learn. We usually cannot get a good grade in exams studied on the last day, and even if we do, everything in our minds disappears a few days after the exam. The same goes for sports. Occasional runs are not enough to increase our fitness; we need to train regularly to strengthen our body and increase our endurance. A single meditation practice can relieve the stress or anger you are experiencing in the moment, lift your mood, and make you more positive and peaceful for the rest of the day. However, unfortunately this effect will be short-lived. The positive effects of meditation become visible in our lives in a permanent way only with regular practice.
Additionally, routines in your life provide a sense of stability, helping you stay connected to yourself and life during turbulent times or when you feel lost. When you want to drop everything and give up, it gives you confidence by reminding you that life continues in its normal course. An activity that motivates you to hear your needs and approach yourself with compassion will allow you to get through the process more easily by providing a safe space where you can take refuge in difficult times. Meditation practice repeated every day during periods when you are coping with change and uncertainty strengthens your bond with the world by creating a feeling of continuity and order.
What is a habit?
Turkish Language Association defines habits as "conditioned behaviors that occur as a result of internal and external influences and always occur in the same way." According to the American Psychological Association (APA), we call well-learned automatic behavioral sequences that are relatively situation-specific and that become independent of cognitive influences over time and are repeated without thinking . The common features of habits are that they occur repeatedly in a routine, under similar conditions and in similar ways, and that they are generally done without consciously thinking about it.
How do we form a habit?
One of the things we need to pay most attention to when forming a habit is repetition. As a behavior is repeated in the same contexts for a certain period of time, it becomes automatic and becomes a habit. According to a study, this period can vary from 18 to 254 days from person to person. So turning the same behavior into a habit is a different adventure for all of us. If you want to make meditation a habit, how long it takes will depend on your personality and life. It's also possible that this will take shorter or longer than you expect. Of course, the prolongation of this process is not a failure, the process can be longer or shorter depending on many different reasons because forming a habit is a process that takes time and effort.
Habits have many different behavioral, cognitive and neurological components. For this reason, picking up your phone first thing in the morning and the habit of smoking are actually different from each other. We can say that cigarette consumption turns into a habit, even an addiction, by following a different path in the brain than a behavioral habit, due to its nicotine content. Today, we will focus on the behavioral aspect of habits, along with tips that may be useful in creating a meditation habit.
To summarize simply, behaviors repeated regularly and in the same context will become habits. Actually the equation seems very simple, right? Meditation can become a habit if you repeat it enough. But this is exactly where the trouble begins. Especially at the beginning of the journey, behaviors that are not yet a habit can be easily abandoned. When we're trying to establish a new routine, we always have an excuse to talk us out of it. Unfortunately, our minds are very creative in making excuses: I don't have time, I need to prepare a very important presentation, it is not possible for me to create a quiet and empty environment... By seeing and accepting this resistant structure of your mind, it is possible to develop methods that will enable you to meditate regularly until you become a habit. So, what can we do for this? Come, let's see together...
10 suggestions to make meditation a habit
1. Make sure to meditate in the same place and at the same time.
It is very important that the behavior we want to make a habit occurs in the same contexts. Therefore, meditating at the same time of the day, in the same location (if possible, in a corner reserved for meditation, if not, on your bed, sofa or on the floor) will help your mind adopt and maintain this behavior. After a while, meditating will become a more comfortable experience when you are in the same location at the same time.
2. Reward yourself
One of the easiest and most enjoyable things you can do to stay motivated is to reward yourself. One of the most powerful factors that increases the frequency of repetition of behaviors is reward. We are generally more likely to repeat a behavior when we feel rewarded. Feeling good as a result of a behavior makes us do the same thing over and over again.
Based on this, you can give yourself small gifts after each meditation practice. This reward may be an extrinsic reward. Every time you meditate, you can reward yourself with an activity, a meal, or an object you love. A second option is to focus on the good feelings that occur after meditating. For a more lasting effect, you can focus on the rewarding aspects of meditation. The pleasure created by this habit will be a sufficient reward in itself. In this way, the habit of meditating is not associated in the mind with a meal, a series of episodes, or an independent activity or object. You can be motivated by the good feelings that meditation itself creates in you and the positive effects it has on your life. Next time, remembering how good this experience was for you will definitely increase your desire to meditate again.
3. Observe yourself
Observing yourself and listening to your needs during the habit formation process helps you recognize the factors that strengthen and weaken your motivation. When do you want to meditate and when do you not? What does this desire and reluctance tell you? To keep track of your mental changes and progress, you can keep a meditation journal, briefly jotting down how you feel each day and how your practice went. This journal can also provide motivation to continue when you don't feel like meditating in the following days. Even if you are not very keen on some days, you may want to meditate in order not to leave your diary empty, which you continue every day without fail.
4. Use the guidance of reluctance
In fact, we may be reluctant to meditate at times when we need it the most. In difficult times, we turn to more comfortable and familiar options to comfort ourselves. These are often things that numb and prevent us from feeling challenging emotions. Clarissa Pinkola Estés summarizes this situation very well in one sentence in her book Women Who Ran with the Wolves : "Breathing allows people to feel their emotions, and when we don't want to feel, we hold our breath." You may have noticed that when you're not feeling well, you make especially bad decisions, and sometimes you just stop without making any decisions. From time to time, it may become difficult to get in touch with our emotions and the judgments in our mind. What will enable us to reach the light and relief we need is to patiently accept these periods and their effects on us. Especially during these periods, taking a few minutes to practice conscious awareness and self-compassion can help you take action by providing just the energy you need.
5. Change your “all or nothing” perspective
“What's the point of continuing a job unless you do it thoroughly?” This approach is actually a mistake we all frequently make. We wait for everything to be perfect before we start something. Unless ideal conditions are met, we find it pointless to continue unless we show the amazing performance we expect from ourselves. However, there is one point that we ignore: What improves us is regular practice. The best teacher is our mistakes (there is no such thing as a mistake in the meditation journey, every step you take is sufficient and valuable as it is). A start well below expectations is still valuable. Don't you think that the first step taken, one way or another, is better than the step never taken? No matter how small, it takes you further from your starting point. In addition, when you include a routine that you are not normally accustomed to in your life, both your mind and body will naturally resist it. So far, when a job hasn't gone the way you wanted, you may have lost your enthusiasm and abandoned it. From now on, how about continuing to try again and again with what you have, even if your expectations are not realized in the process of acquiring a meditation habit?
6. Focus on sources of motivation
It is easier for meditation to become a habit when it starts with internal motivation. The pleasure you will get from meditation will increase when you really want it and do it from your heart. When you clarify what you expect from meditation, you will go through this process with more realistic expectations and be ready for possible ups and downs, and you will experience less motivation loss because your motivation will not be focused solely on success. Motives such as feeling good, understanding yourself, enjoying life, and relieving strong emotions such as stress, anxiety and anger will enable you to maintain your motivation for longer than other factors. So, don't start meditating just because the people you look up to are meditating or because experts say it is good for your health. Which need do you want to develop a meditation habit for? Make this clear in your mind first. Thus, when you question why you meditate, clearer and more reflective answers appear in your mind.
7. Make meditation a part of your daily life
Where can you fit meditation into your day at this time in your life? When you wake up in the morning, for ten minutes in your bed before going to bed, on your meditation cushion during the day, while sitting at your desk at work, while walking in the park... Think about the moments when you can most comfortably incorporate meditation into your daily life and don't hesitate to try them. All of them will be valuable experiences for meditation to become a habit. Each one is an opportunity to observe and get to know yourself in other areas of your life. If morning meditation is not for you, you can try it and see this and use the later hours of the day for meditation. If you have a lifestyle that requires you to travel frequently, you can try to meditate in places outside your home. Once you finally create a routine that you can maintain while traveling, at work, and on vacation, you can maintain your meditation habit for a longer time.
8. Start with small, short-term goals
Set yourself small and short-term goals for meditation and make sure they are not too rigid. Small and achievable goals motivate us more in the beginning and keep us going. “I will meditate for at least fifteen minutes every day.” instead, “I want to spend time listening to my mind, even if just for a few minutes today.” you can say. It's okay if you don't reach your daily goal, be willing to do whatever you can for yourself in the following days, but don't push yourself for it. Imagine that you have acquired the habit of reading books. “I will read fifty pages of a book every day.” Starting this path by saying this is actually cutting the branch you are sitting on. Even if you keep pushing yourself for a few days, it will become increasingly difficult to maintain this goal. To develop a reading habit, promise to pick up your book every day, read as much as you can, and put it down when you get bored. Today your mind may be full, you don't have enough time, you read three lines and give it up, but the next day you find yourself unable to stop yourself and halfway through the book. The same goes for meditation. We cannot expect the same thing from every day. If you remind yourself of this frequently while trying to form any habit, the feelings of guilt and inadequacy you feel when you do not meet your daily goals will decrease.
9. Start with guided meditations
We may need guidance when doing something we are not used to. You may find it difficult to keep your mind in the present moment, especially if you are new to your meditation practice or returning after a long break. When sitting quietly and watching your mind does not seem possible for you at that moment, you can practice guided meditations. During meditation, you may encounter thoughts and feelings that you have never noticed before. It is also difficult to accept some emotions and judgments that you have not yet confronted or have not risen to the level of consciousness, as they are when you are alone. In such moments, the guidance of a compassionate voice that guides you sheds light on you and helps you find your way.
10. Leverage your past experiences
Think about something you have made a habit of in the past. How did that process go for you? One of the most realistic sources that can guide you is your past experiences. In this process, "I'm glad I did it!" What were the things you said and found beneficial? For example, was there something that you looked back on and realized wasn't good for you? What advice would you give to a close friend to start a habit? We mostly have clues that will help us create and continue habits because we know ourselves best. As you remember your experiences, ways to make meditation a habit will automatically appear. When you combine these with the suggestions above, things will become even easier.
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